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2:40 p.m. - 2001-05-26
Breathalyzer
I had my wisdom teeth pulled about a week ago, and my mouth is still pretty sore. Chewing is something you take for granted until it is impossible for you to chew. I have gaping wounds, in all 4 corners of my mouth, that pour out vital fluids when the slightest contact is made to them. Soup is okay.

I can eat soup.

But the worst part is that it hurts to brush my teeth, so I choose not to. I haven't brushed my teeth in about a week. A strange, filmy slime is growing on my incisors. I'm real paranoid that I might have bad breath, or that my teeth will rot and fall out of my head. I've been warning people in advance though, "I have bloody wounds in my mouth and I haven't brushed in a week, so please stay 10 feet away from me at all times."

In addition to soup, I've still been able to chew on chewin' tobaccy.

Soup and snuff.

So, my breath might not be that bad. A fragrant blend of Skoal and Spaghettio's.

Some might say that I have the breath of a champion.

 

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