6:25 p.m. - 2004-08-26
Guest Entry for Pepito Smith (as Crock-pot)
The following is an excerpt of an entry written by yours truly under the pseudonym Crock-pot as a guest entry for pepitosmith.blogspot.com on August 17, 2004.....during my August hiatus.
I wanted to share a story with all of you, if you don't mind......
One thing me and Edgar Frog have in common is our utter disgust and hatred for fat slobby fatty fatsos.
That's right.
I live here in Phoenix, AZ.....
See, I am not Edgar Frog of edgarfrog.diaryland.com fame.....He lives in Las Vegas.
Pepito of pepitosmith.blogspot.com fame lives in L.A.
I live in Phoenix....
So there.
Anyways, August is monsoon season here in Phoenix, AZ.
Boy, does it rain hard!
You shoulda seen it today, boy did it rain hard!
The streets even flood....It's because Phoenix is in a valley, and the water fills up the valley like a bowl. I was driving around on my lunch break today and sending tidal waves of water up on either side of my car as I plowed through the flooded intersections. I got caught right in the eye of the storm on my lunch break. Some poor saps were out walking in this shit.
But not me, I was in my car.
My windshield wipers were flopping back and forth so fast, you couldn't even see out the windshield, and all my windows were fogging up besides that.
It looked like I was having sex with Leonardo DiCaprio in my car.
On the Titanic.
The way the windows were fogging up like that.
A couple times at a red light, I even had to roll down my window in the heavy rain, so I could shout to the guy at the red light next to me, "It's not what it looks like in here. I'm not fucking Leo in my back seat. It's just fogging up from the rain."
I didn't want the other guys at the red light to think I was fagging out in there, and make their own Titanic connection because of the foggy car windows.
It didn't occur to my brain to make a Kate Winslet connection until just now, otherwise I could've lied and told them that Kate Winslet was passed out in my back seat because I just got done pounding her ass with my cock.
"She does this every time she's in Phoenix," I could've said.
My mind was stuck on Leo.
Like always!
Anyways, as I drove through the blistering rain, I saw many poor bastards stuck at bus stops.
Not much shelter there! They were getting drenched.
Sometimes cars drove by and splashed them on purpose!
I didn't feel too sorry for them. Most of them were Mexicans and cripples.
My point is, after the rain let up, and as my journey was ending, I saw the fattest hoggy bitch in the world sitting at a bus stop. She reminded me very much of a fucking Gamorrean Guard from Return of the Jedi. This is what they look like, if you don't know:
That is what she looked like pretty much......except she was not holding an axe, as far as I could tell.
Boy was she fat!
450 lbs. easy!
I just wonder how they lift her up into the bus.
Maybe she wasn't waiting for the bus though. Maybe industrial forklifts make occasional stops at bus stop benches. Or maybe she was just beached.....and the storm had brought her inland from the Pacific Ocean.
The rain, and splashing, apparently had taken its toll on her slobby torso. Her white t-shirt was totally drenched, and thus, see-through.
Apparently they don't make bras in her size.
I saw the most distinctive and defined outlines of her fat, droopy bosoms and canteloupe-sized nipples that you can imagine.
DISGUSTING!
My hatred for her made me want to make a U-turn so I could drive by one more time and splash her again......But then that would've made her shirt even more see-through.
A lose-lose situation. She might as well have been sitting there topless, letting her 75DDD breasts hang in the breeze, that's how easy to see they were through her see-through shirt.
It was like a Fear Factor wet t-shirt contest.
Her nipples were the size of my head.
They really were. I did a circle around the block to double check.
Disgusting....
Still....I got a good masturbation session out of it. Thinking about them.
Hey, what can I say, I take what I can get.
