11:05 p.m. - 2001-10-21
In Search Of the Wal-Mart Girl: Part One
So, I guess there's this musical family named The Reeses...or The Rees...something like that. I mean, they're not famous, they don't have any albums or anything. They probably just practice together in their back yard and maybe play at birthday parties. It's just some random family.
But they were on a Wal-Mart commercial that I just saw, talking about how Wal-Mart is turning back prices and what not. You know how Wal-Mart interviews random, regular customers? Well...this particular commercial had the musical Reese family.
Anyways, the younger Reese girl was like an angel. Beauty radiated off her like smoke from a radiator. I instantly fell in love with the young girl on the Wal-Mart commercial. She's probably 17 or 18, blonde hair, blue eyes....she was like a little goddess. And so...in the heat of passion, I devised a plan:
I've only seen that commercial once, and its television airtime will be limited, I'm sure, so I must act fast. I am going to try my hardest, utilizing all technology at my disposal, such as telephone and internet to honestly try to get a hold of this girl from this Wal-Mart commercial. My goal is to contact her and ask her to marry me, and I will keep my loyal diary readers up to date with the developments.
This isn't as impossible as you might think; after all, I know her last name, basic physical description, and if I see that fucking commercial again I'll pay attention to where she lives.
I've contacted old friends of mine from Seattle before that I hadn't seen or heard from in 15 years.....why should a random girl from a Wal-Mart commercial be any different?
It is possible to locate her. Wal-Mart has her information on record somewhere, since she appeared in their commercial. Don't think I'm above going to Wal-Mart's website to gather information.
Also, don't think I'm above hiring a private detective who will locate anybody, anywhere for a $50 fee.
Also, don't think I'm above sending a white powder to Wal-Mart's corporate offices threatening them and their families if they don't give me the girl's phone number...
